Books That Have Shaped My Feminism

It turns out that I was a feminist long before I ever went to college and had near-constant internet access; I just had no idea that what I believed was called feminism. I remember being in Sunday School classes at church and feeling as though I could be more than what they told us we could be. They said, "You are daughters of God, you are queens, you are beautiful and wonderful and you will be great mothers." But at the same time, I heard other things, I heard, "You can go on a mission and be a wonderful missionary, you can go to college and become educated, you can enter the military and work to protect people." There were so many options in the world for me.

Ultimately, I chose to go to college and receive an education. I became an English major. Perhaps this spelled the beginning of knowing that I was a feminist; at least, I was aware of feminism early in college, because my Critical Writing class, English 295, the class that taught me how to write a ten-page paper and love it, had all girls in it. We could get into the meatiest readings of feminism without feeling uncomfortable, because the men at Brigham Young University meant well, but they were not always open to our thoughts. It was an all-female class with a female professor, and I learned that in a class like this there was no fear, no anxiety, because there were no boys and we didn't feel as though we had to put on a front for them.

Perhaps this sounds unfair, but I am one of many English majors. We may not all be the same, but many of us chose the major because books are kinder than people, and they are more forgiving and less able to break our hearts the way the world can.

I was not an active feminist until after I came to terms with my mental health struggles. Before that, I assumed, I believed, I followed. I knew that I was a divine daughter of God, that I would someday be a queen in paradise, and I knew that I wanted to be married and have children. I still know these things, and I still want these things. But I also know that I can be a writer, a reader, a leader, and an example to everyone in my life, and not just some distant, unknowable man and children. I want that man and children- want them with my whole heart, with my whole life. But I choose to want them. I choose it every day of my life. And I have the ability to choose them, because I understand that I have a choice in the matter. You always have a choice, even if sometimes the language of our teachers is couched to make women feel as though the only respectable choice is motherhood. It is not the respectable choice. It is a respectable choice.

I am a feminist who hopes someday to be married and to have children. The two decisions are not incongruous. All it means is that I want other women and men to be able to make the same choice that I have made. I want people to be able to choose whether they have children or not. I want people to be able to choose between a job or parenthood. And I want people to be able to make those choices without fear. Technically, people have these freedoms already. This is especially true in America and Europe, places where modern families and lifestyles exist in so many different ways. But there are still attitudes that suggest that only women should stay at home to care for children, and that only men should work to provide for the family. This is the preference of the church, but there should be no shame or fear for those who cannot or who do not want to follow this pattern. Everyone should pray for guidance in how best to create a family for themselves on the earth, and they should feel as though they can create a loving family without being ostracized by those who follow more traditional family patterns and who disapprove of those who do not do the same.

I have read many books over the years; as a casual reader, as a fangirl, as a feminist, and as an English major. Here is a list of the books that have shaped my worldview in some way or another.

1. Jane Austen's novels: Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, Mansfield Park, Emma, Northanger Abbey, and Persuasion have all contributed to the way I think. They are about romance, love and marriage, but they do not take themselves too seriously, as Jane Austen did not take herself too seriously. It's something to keep in mind- if you read Pride and Prejudice and sigh over how romantic Mr. Darcy is, then you're missing the point of Jane Austen's writing: everybody in that culture was hyper-focused on marriage without considering the romantic aspects of relationships. Jane Austen was more of a humorous writer than a romantic one. (Which is not to say that I don't sigh over Mr. Darcy. It's just that I only sigh over Colin Firth in a wet shirt. Because DANG.)
2. Louisa May Alcott's Little Women and sequels (Good Wives, which is the second half of Little Women; Little Men; and Jo's Boys). Not only do these books depict healthy romantic relationships (which is something that should be a standard for every romantic novel), but they also discuss morality outside of religion as well as religious morality. Louisa May Alcott's family was part of the Transcendentalist movement in New England; she was acquainted with Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau, among other writers of the age. The Transcendentalists were all about getting back to one's roots with nature, living simply, serving others, and improving themselves. These values were associated with or without religion as individuals chose to believe, and out of all the movements of literature between Shakespeare and J.K. Rowling, I identify most with the Transcendentalists.
3. The entire works of Tamora Pierce. I was introduced to Tamora Pierce in junior high school by a few good friends who enjoyed her work. It was my first introduction to feminism in fiction, because Pierce's work is undeniably feminist, and in a genre that doesn't always see much feminism, either- that of fantasy. Pierce writes straight-up medieval fantasy, with complex and beautiful magic systems, and her stories are about young women, written for young women, and they celebrate young women. I loved Tamora Pierce's books long before I knew what feminism was. There were characters I identified with. Alanna of the Lioness quartet was never anything like me, and neither was Daine of the Immortals quartet. Aly, in the Trickster duo, was not much like me, either. But then I found the Protector of the Small series, with Keladry of Mindelan, a girl who wants to be a knight. I loved Keladry from the very beginning because she looked like me. She had brown hair and hazel eyes like me, and she was tall for her age the way I was before I reached my full potential at five foot five and a quarter. And she wasn't thin- she was described with beautiful words and phrases like "broad-shouldered" and "strong," and it wasn't negative, either. Keladry was beautiful, and she was also a large, healthy girl. And then the series became more about Keladry's desire to protect others than it did about her desire to become a knight. She wanted to become a knight because that was what knighthood meant to her- that she could protect others. But it was never just about achieving a status traditionally awarded to men. It was about using that status responsibly. And all of Pierce's writing has spoken in the same ways to me, about girls who can learn and grow and strive for the very best the world has to offer, and that they can do so as well and sometimes better than men can, and that they use their power wisely instead of wasting it.
4. The Nancy Drew books. They've always been fun and light-hearted reading for me. One of my favorite aspects of the books was that Nancy solved mysteries, sometimes with her friends Bess and George, and sometimes with all their boyfriends Ned, Burt, and Dave. (I'm not a hundred percent solid on those names.) But Nancy didn't always get knocked on the head and captured and had to be rescued by Ned; sometimes Ned got knocked on the head and captured and Nancy rescued him. Nancy's friend George (yes, a girl) learned judo and she used it to take down bad guys.. Nancy's father, a lawyer, gave her cases to work on and trusted that she would work hard and do her job well.
5. Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte. This story, for me, is the ultimate in healthy relationships. It doesn't start out that way, though. Jane falls in love with Rochester, who is mean to his ward Adele, looks down on his distant relation/housekeeper Mrs. Fairfax because he believes she is unintelligent, and plays games with Jane's mind by using Blanche Ingram to make her jealous. And let's not forget about the fact that he was married already, to a crazy lady from Jamaica who he kept locked in the attic so that she wouldn't kill people. Jane falls in love with him despite all this, and she sets a good enough example for Rochester that he is a better person for having met and observing Jane in the first place. And then, after the almost-married-bigamy scandal, Jane leaves. She has the strength to leave him, despite temptation and love, and she makes the choice to remain true to what she believes in. And then, even after Rochester's crazy wife sets the house on fire and kills herself and Rochester goes blind in one eye, even after that- Jane comes back, and Rochester has changed and become a better man because he learned to suffer without her. 
6. Everything that Rick Riordan has ever written. This so far includes the Percy Jackson series, the Kane Chronicles, and the Heroes of Olympus series. In all of these books, there are strong female characters of all ages, strong male characters of all ages, characters who are not just generically attractive white people but who are from different cultures- black kids, Hispanic kids, Asian kids. And the books are laugh-out-loud funny, but not once does any character make a sexist or racist joke. Everybody should read these books.
7. The Mysterious Benedict Society series by Trenton Lee Stewart. Wonderful characters, excellent story. Delicious, delicious books.
8. The Redwall books by Brian Jacques. You should basically just read them all, there's twenty-something and everyone's a mammal of some kind. The food descriptions are positively mouth-watering.

There are more, of course- so many more. But these are the ones that shaped my childhood and adolescence, and they have done the same for many more people. Read them, have your kids read them, and talk to them about it. Ask questions, answer questions. Talk about why the girls in these books are so much better than girls in other books and in movies and television. Show them that girls in real life and female characters both can be strong, can be smart, can be kind, can be brave. Show them that anybody can turn out to be mean or stupid or cowardly, no matter whether they're a boy or a girl. And show them that they can work to become the good things and avoid the bad things by doing good things, by helping people, by kindness and courage. Boy or girl, these are qualities you can strive for, and that you can succeed in. It's the work of a lifetime, and I shall undertake it the same as you.